It was an eventful week for the teacher formerly known as the White Monkey (my wife and a daughter in the U.S. want that nickname retired).
First, my daughter Joanna stood on her own for a full three seconds the day before she turned eight months old. I happened to see her left hand floating in the air, so I checked to see what her right hand was holding on to -- the crib or the wall? Neither. Both hands were floating in air, kind of like she was surfing. I was too shocked to think about a photo, and Phuong wasn't there. I've seen Joanna stand on her own -- intentionally -- twice since then, but I'm not thinking photo. I'm more concerned she doesn't crash to earth, but so far she sort of gracefully plops to her butt for a soft landing.
Joanna got another vaccination in her thigh last week and cried for two seconds and got over it. But she had a low-grade fever for a few days, and was pretty grumpy. Contributing to her grumpiness were two new bottom teeth that broke through. She now has eight teeth showing. Poor kid.
Phuong and I celebrated our one-year wedding anniversary on March 10. I bought her organic currants (ridiculously expensive), dried blueberries (even more expensive), scented fake flowers and some real flowers (silly expensive) and a gold chain and crucifix (almost cheaper than the other stuff). I also assembled a small family photo collage. We've packed a lot of life into the past year -- a couple of motorbike wrecks by the teacher formerly known as the White Monkey; a baby; teaching ups and downs; furnishing a new house; battling immigration issues in our bid to get Phuong to the U.S.; and I haven't had a cigarette since March 23, 2016. Through it all, I'm happy as hell but still just as bad-tempered as ever. Joanna has a little bit of a temper also, but overall, we're a very, very, very happy family. Damn it.
Speaking of damn it, I tried to buy a cake for our anniversary at a bakery called Hanh Phuc (I have a new name for it that sounds so similar it's almost vulgar). Some twit of a girl who was smaller than -- and not as smart as -- the cake I was buying, got in my face because I didn't give her the 444,000 dong ($20 USD) for the cake fast enough. I had something in my eye after I gave her 200,000, so I held my hand up and motioned for her to wait a second. I also pointed to my red, tearing eye. This mechanical moron didn't flinch and barked (there is no other word for it) "440 thousand"!!! in an unsavory tone. I stayed calm -- for me -- and, while tending to my burning right eye, I told the smiling simpleton that she was being rude. She laughed at me (or maybe it was just a big smile). So I simply snatched the money out her hands, said that it's easy to be rude, and left the bakery cake-less and rubbing my damn eye. Of course, I wasn't trying to short-change the bakery, I didn't even have the cake yet because they were getting it ready for me. Also, I shop there quite often, which means I spend a lot of money there because it isn't cheap. Make that, used to shop there and used to spend a lot of money there. But this sort of thing happens way too often here to the teacher formerly known as the White Monkey. Folks in Bien Hoa don't get the basic courtesies. I've lived here for more than four years and I've never heard the words "please" (lam on) or "excuse me" (toi xin loi).
But enough sour stuff. I forgot for a moment how happy I am.
The class I stopped teaching got a young British teacher in my place, like I suggested in my last blog. I saw three girls from the class clapping and giggling with excitement when they saw the young Brit heading toward their room. Maybe they'll be on time now.
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