Our neighborhood has been a little gritty lately. I woke up the other morning and Phuong's mom had poured sand across the sidewalk and street in front of our house. Apparently, there was a "domestic dispute" that got physical, with blood spilled in the street and on our sidewalk. Mom wanted to cover the blood. Why the combatants, rumored to be husband and wife, decided to bleed near our house is a mystery to me. Again, I don't understand. Honestly, I have no other details and don't really care. The White Monkey has his own problems. Later in the week, a guy on a motorbike ran into a 3-year-old girl on the street near our house, causing scrapes and scratches but no major damage. I was told the driver wasn't going very fast, and the little girl was running free in the street, until she got clocked. All is OK. A couple of days later, a guy who was rumored to have been consuming alcohol ran into a telephone-type pole in our 'hood. I was told he went to the hospital here, which I don't recommend unless you're unconscious. I've been there -- unconscious in Bien Hoa and in the hospital. Unconscious is OK but the hospital is iffy. Things have been quiet the past few days, so I'll hope for the best and expect the worst.
I have a suggestion for Vietnam in general and Bien Hoa in particular: Don't use so much plastic. All the little shops put everything in plastic bags. A pack of cigarettes. A box of cookies. Chips. Soda. Everything goes in a plastic bag. When Phuong and I take our nightly walk when I'm not teaching a late class, we see a lot of plastic bags and trash in the street. It seems unnecessary. Another suggestion: Don't let people burn their trash, especially old tires. There's nothing like riding the bike to work and going through a cloud of smoke created by burning rubber. The air in Bien Hoa is nothing to breathe heavily about even without the burning trash -- it's only slightly better than the air in Bakersfield. Recycling is slowly catching on here, but there's still a lot of work and educating to do. And the trash problem isn't just in Vietnam, by the way. It's everywhere I've been. Disappointing.
It's been nasty hot lately, which means temperatures here have been seasonal. It's in the mid-90s every day with humidity about 65 to 75 percent. I think that's why my cuts take so long to heal. I know that's why I have my souvenir (heat rash). I'm very grateful to Dr. Hyde in Yellow Springs for the prescription cream I have for the heat rash. All clear.
Phuong and I are really looking forward to our trip to Hong Kong in a few weeks. It should be fascinating and fun, and it means another stamp in Phuong's passport. Hopefully, that will make a difference when she applies again for a visa to the U.S. I have to go back home for eye work soon, and she really wants to be with me -- and meet my family and friends, see my house, and check out the vibe in Yellow Springs. We're very hopeful she gets approved this time.
When I check the numbers on my blog, I can see what countries my readers are from. I don't have a lot of readers, but the mix of countries is interesting. I was a little surprised to see readers from Kenya, Lebanon, Ukraine, Russia, Cyprus and Egypt. One week I had readers from six of the seven continents. No one in Antarctica reads my blog. I guess the folks there aren't bored enough. I get a few hits from Peru, which I still miss.
Nothing else exciting to report. Actually, none of this crap was exciting, but it's the best I could come up with. Classes are OK and Phuong and I are very, very happy with our life together. She beat me 6-3 in tennis last week and we tied 5-5 a couple of times. And I still love her.
Monday, April 6, 2015
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
We have 2 motorbike accidents in one day
Phuong and I were involved in two motorbike accidents this past Tuesday. I was the driver, and of course, Phuong was the passenger. I am pleased to report neither of us were seriously injured and that neither accident was my fault. Both incidents occurred at traffic lights.
The first one happened after our morning tennis. We were going to get our post-match coffee to celebrate my courageous and hard-fought victory. We were stopping at a red light when a man with a woman on the back shot past me and tried to cut me off so he could be ahead of me rather than alongside of me at the light. Since there was only about a foot of space between my bike and some teenager's bike in front of me, the man's bike hit my front tire. The woman's unattractive legs took the brunt of the bump, and she glared at me. I told her in flawless, snarky English that her driver caused the little mishap, and that the White Monkey was innocent until proven guilty. She thought for a moment and seemed to agree, hitting the driver on the back. He laughed and shrugged at me. Off we went.
The second accident was more serious and could have been worse. A few hours later we were going to the supermarket. We were stopped at a red light and we were first in line. The light turned green, I started to go, and then some douchebag comes out of nowhere on the right and hits us. It's really weird because there was no reason for him to be heading in this direction. I suspect he was drunk -- after all, it was almost noon. Anyway, he knocked my bike over on top of me. Phuong brilliantly and instinctively rolled on the road and avoided any injury. I banged up my left arm and left knee (oh god, I hope my tennis game is OK) and my left mirror was knocked off. Very minor stuff. And the offending driver never stopped. He looked back at us on the ground and drove off. No one made a move to stop him as he got away. I'm told that's not done in Vietnam. In fact, the other bike riders acted pissed off that we were in their way and slowing down traffic as we got up off the ground. The attitude here seems to be (and the locals tell me this): Take care of yourself and screw the other guy. I see it on the bikes, in the stores, in coffee shop lines, everywhere. This country has been through a lot, so I sort of understand, even though everyone tells me: You don't understand. Honestly, the accidents didn't bother me as much as the people's attitudes about them. But I'm just a white monkey.
Phuong and I love our morning tennis, but the guys who play after us come while we're still on the court make a spectacle of themselves. They try to talk with Phuong during our matches. One guy circles the court while we're playing, swinging his arms like he's swinging a racket. Others talk really loud. Some eat and talk with their mouths full. After one of our matches, I put my open tea on a sink next to the court because there was nowhere else to put it. Immediately, one of the guys goes to the sink and starts spitting his mucous-filled saliva next to my tea. Shockingly, I left the tea there. Actually, some of the guys are wonderful so it's no big deal. But when I'm distracted, my tennis game slips. It's not good to begin with, so the commotion makes matters even worse. Whatever.
One more piece of cheerful news. It's 95 degrees every day, so my heat rash/souvenir has returned. I prepared this time, however, and brought medicine from the U.S.
Phuong and I are very happy together ... well, I'm very happy, and we're planning a trip to Hong Kong next month. School is OK, so other than psychotic motorbike drivers, of which there are many, and wacko tennis players, of which there are a few, life is wonderful. I can thank Phuong for that.
The first one happened after our morning tennis. We were going to get our post-match coffee to celebrate my courageous and hard-fought victory. We were stopping at a red light when a man with a woman on the back shot past me and tried to cut me off so he could be ahead of me rather than alongside of me at the light. Since there was only about a foot of space between my bike and some teenager's bike in front of me, the man's bike hit my front tire. The woman's unattractive legs took the brunt of the bump, and she glared at me. I told her in flawless, snarky English that her driver caused the little mishap, and that the White Monkey was innocent until proven guilty. She thought for a moment and seemed to agree, hitting the driver on the back. He laughed and shrugged at me. Off we went.
The second accident was more serious and could have been worse. A few hours later we were going to the supermarket. We were stopped at a red light and we were first in line. The light turned green, I started to go, and then some douchebag comes out of nowhere on the right and hits us. It's really weird because there was no reason for him to be heading in this direction. I suspect he was drunk -- after all, it was almost noon. Anyway, he knocked my bike over on top of me. Phuong brilliantly and instinctively rolled on the road and avoided any injury. I banged up my left arm and left knee (oh god, I hope my tennis game is OK) and my left mirror was knocked off. Very minor stuff. And the offending driver never stopped. He looked back at us on the ground and drove off. No one made a move to stop him as he got away. I'm told that's not done in Vietnam. In fact, the other bike riders acted pissed off that we were in their way and slowing down traffic as we got up off the ground. The attitude here seems to be (and the locals tell me this): Take care of yourself and screw the other guy. I see it on the bikes, in the stores, in coffee shop lines, everywhere. This country has been through a lot, so I sort of understand, even though everyone tells me: You don't understand. Honestly, the accidents didn't bother me as much as the people's attitudes about them. But I'm just a white monkey.
Phuong and I love our morning tennis, but the guys who play after us come while we're still on the court make a spectacle of themselves. They try to talk with Phuong during our matches. One guy circles the court while we're playing, swinging his arms like he's swinging a racket. Others talk really loud. Some eat and talk with their mouths full. After one of our matches, I put my open tea on a sink next to the court because there was nowhere else to put it. Immediately, one of the guys goes to the sink and starts spitting his mucous-filled saliva next to my tea. Shockingly, I left the tea there. Actually, some of the guys are wonderful so it's no big deal. But when I'm distracted, my tennis game slips. It's not good to begin with, so the commotion makes matters even worse. Whatever.
One more piece of cheerful news. It's 95 degrees every day, so my heat rash/souvenir has returned. I prepared this time, however, and brought medicine from the U.S.
Phuong and I are very happy together ... well, I'm very happy, and we're planning a trip to Hong Kong next month. School is OK, so other than psychotic motorbike drivers, of which there are many, and wacko tennis players, of which there are a few, life is wonderful. I can thank Phuong for that.
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Karaoke in your face (and ears)
Karaoke is HUGE here. Enormous. In fact, people in our neighborhood have
karaoke connected to their TVs and extremely loud sound systems. That
means you get the treat of hearing these guys, and it's mostly men sitting on the floor in their homes by themselves, singing Vietnamese classics that
can be heard for miles around until 10 at night. And if that's not enough, there are
coffee shops nearby where the singing can be heard over even greater
distances until 11. And there are karaoke studios (I guess that's what you'd call them) all over town. Wonderful. All Vietnamese believe they can sing very well ... and
every man believes he is a great lover. You decide what's true. Actually, the words to the hymns at mass are shown on TV screens all over the church, so karaoke is in our souls here as well.
Sunday church is always a wild ride. We go Sunday at 6:30 p.m. because I have to teach 3 to 5 p.m., so traffic is intense. Even more intense is the jockeying for parking behind the church. Bikes zip past you to get the "better" parking space and bikes cut in front of you as you're about to pull into a space. A guy almost broadsided (he came within inches) a girl last Sunday as she was turning right to park her bike. I had stopped because she was turning to park, and the guy passed me on the right and just missed her. He was holding a small child, by the way. We were 15 minutes early for the service at that time, so I didn't understand any of it. But then again, as the Vietnamese always tell me: You don't understand.
I do understand that the mix of more cars and boatloads of bikes isn't a particularly good one. The car drivers think they're still on a bike, so they cut in front, pull out, and lay on the horn. The bike riders say some curse words, some of which I've learned, at the car drivers. The car drivers can't hear over their horns. Since no one pays attention to traffic laws, it's quite dangerous and getting more so.
Back to mass. Our service is performed by a priest who has bad eyes. I think he has prescription sunglasses, which he wears during the service. I'm sympathetic because my eyes have issues as well. The alter boys come up and I think they whisper the words he's supposed to say. He plugs along and gets the job done. I like him, but I don't understand much of what he says.
One of the truly nice spots in Bien Hoa is Lido coffee shop not far from our house. Phuong and I usually go there after our 7 a.m. tennis. Lido is next to the Dong Nai River, so there's always a breeze. Boats go by, giving you something to look at, and half the time the people in the boats yell "hello." Sadly, all this is changing. Houses are being built between Lido and the river. Tons of dirt was (were?) brought in, shrinking the river's width and obscuring the wonderful view of the river. Heavy equipment has begun construction of the houses. Besides losing the nice view, it's noisy as hell. The one positive: Lido's coffee rocks whether you can see the river or not.
We had nice weather for about three weeks, but those days are gone. It's so hot, the students aren't complaining any more about air conditioning making it a chilly 89 degrees in the classroom. They just put on jackets when it gets below 90.
I've always enjoyed the students here, and now they're even more enjoyable since they've come back to school from the Tet holiday. Not sure why, but I'm not complaining. Maybe it's their new year's resolution not to make teacher John's life difficult. I approve.
Sunday church is always a wild ride. We go Sunday at 6:30 p.m. because I have to teach 3 to 5 p.m., so traffic is intense. Even more intense is the jockeying for parking behind the church. Bikes zip past you to get the "better" parking space and bikes cut in front of you as you're about to pull into a space. A guy almost broadsided (he came within inches) a girl last Sunday as she was turning right to park her bike. I had stopped because she was turning to park, and the guy passed me on the right and just missed her. He was holding a small child, by the way. We were 15 minutes early for the service at that time, so I didn't understand any of it. But then again, as the Vietnamese always tell me: You don't understand.
I do understand that the mix of more cars and boatloads of bikes isn't a particularly good one. The car drivers think they're still on a bike, so they cut in front, pull out, and lay on the horn. The bike riders say some curse words, some of which I've learned, at the car drivers. The car drivers can't hear over their horns. Since no one pays attention to traffic laws, it's quite dangerous and getting more so.
Back to mass. Our service is performed by a priest who has bad eyes. I think he has prescription sunglasses, which he wears during the service. I'm sympathetic because my eyes have issues as well. The alter boys come up and I think they whisper the words he's supposed to say. He plugs along and gets the job done. I like him, but I don't understand much of what he says.
One of the truly nice spots in Bien Hoa is Lido coffee shop not far from our house. Phuong and I usually go there after our 7 a.m. tennis. Lido is next to the Dong Nai River, so there's always a breeze. Boats go by, giving you something to look at, and half the time the people in the boats yell "hello." Sadly, all this is changing. Houses are being built between Lido and the river. Tons of dirt was (were?) brought in, shrinking the river's width and obscuring the wonderful view of the river. Heavy equipment has begun construction of the houses. Besides losing the nice view, it's noisy as hell. The one positive: Lido's coffee rocks whether you can see the river or not.
We had nice weather for about three weeks, but those days are gone. It's so hot, the students aren't complaining any more about air conditioning making it a chilly 89 degrees in the classroom. They just put on jackets when it gets below 90.
I've always enjoyed the students here, and now they're even more enjoyable since they've come back to school from the Tet holiday. Not sure why, but I'm not complaining. Maybe it's their new year's resolution not to make teacher John's life difficult. I approve.
Saturday, February 21, 2015
A hectic trip to spicy Thailand
Phuong's passport now has a stamp from another country. We went to Thailand for five days and it was a whirlwind trip to the say the least.
We did the following in a very short time: rode a bus everywhere; saw a food/dance/comedy show called Nanta; ate bland, mediocre international buffets; saw a tiger show; saw a snake show; ate bland, mediocre international buffets; rode a bus everywhere; went from Bangkok to Pattaya; took a boat ride to a small island and went swimming (actually, I taught Phuong how to swim); went to a sheep petting farm; saw a laser etching of the king's son on the side of a big rock; tried to see the queen; went to a wretched alligator skin store crawling with Chinese tourists; went to a silly 3-D museum; ate lots of exotic fruit; rode an elephant; saw a transexual international cultural show that was awesome; went shopping in Bangkok; got a massage in our hotel room; and ate marvelous Thai street food.
The highlights: street food; transexual international cultural show; the beach and water.
The lowlights: the bus rides; international buffets; alligator store with Chinese tourists; the bus rides and international buffets.
Bangkok is a very modern city. It's packed with freeways and cars, and they ride on the wrong side (the left side) of the road. There aren't nearly as many motorbikes in Thailand as there are in Vietnam. Downtown Bangkok is full of skyscrapers, street food, cars, incense, statues and people. Pattaya is a beach town (more like a city) about three hours by bus from Bangkok. It's a little more laid-back and a little less congested than Bangkok. We took a bouncy boat ride to an island near Pattaya and went swimming. The salt water was very clear, and we had a nice time. Should have stayed longer, but we got back on the bus.
I like ladies, and boys are OK when they're my students and they behave well. But the blend of ladies and boys isn't my cup of papaya juice. There were many, many lady-boys in Thailand. Either that, or a lot of the pretty girls have Adam's apples and stubble. To each their own, of course, and it's no skin off my butt. Actually, the transexual cultural show we saw had lots of singing, dancing and extravagant costumes, and it was one of our favorite parts of the trip. So there.
The people in Thailand are very nice and polite. Everyone smiles and bows their heads when they greet you. We went with a tour group of Vietnamese folk, and other than cutting in line and reaching across my face at the international buffets, they were quite nice. One lady in particular was helpful, offering mouthwash to Phuong, who threw up every time we rode the bus the first two days. Phuong had a rough start to the trip, but once we discovered motion sickness pills, she was fine. Phuong found a great outdoor restaurant our last night in Bangkok with spectacular (and spicy) food. By the way, Phuong is an awesome travel companion, and she looks hot in a bathing suit.
I'd certainly recommend a visit to Thailand, and I'd definitely recommend the food, if you can handle the spice. I'd also advise you to avoid international buffets, unnecessary bus rides, and beautiful women with stubble and Adam's apples (unless that's your thing -- to each their own). Thailand gets a thumbs-up, but honestly, it's great to be back in Vietnam, where Tet holiday is in full swing and we were greeted by two scorpions in our living room. There really is no place like home.
Note: I spell transexual with one "s" because internet research informed me that transexuals prefer this spelling to "transsexual." What the hell do I know?
We did the following in a very short time: rode a bus everywhere; saw a food/dance/comedy show called Nanta; ate bland, mediocre international buffets; saw a tiger show; saw a snake show; ate bland, mediocre international buffets; rode a bus everywhere; went from Bangkok to Pattaya; took a boat ride to a small island and went swimming (actually, I taught Phuong how to swim); went to a sheep petting farm; saw a laser etching of the king's son on the side of a big rock; tried to see the queen; went to a wretched alligator skin store crawling with Chinese tourists; went to a silly 3-D museum; ate lots of exotic fruit; rode an elephant; saw a transexual international cultural show that was awesome; went shopping in Bangkok; got a massage in our hotel room; and ate marvelous Thai street food.
The highlights: street food; transexual international cultural show; the beach and water.
The lowlights: the bus rides; international buffets; alligator store with Chinese tourists; the bus rides and international buffets.
Bangkok is a very modern city. It's packed with freeways and cars, and they ride on the wrong side (the left side) of the road. There aren't nearly as many motorbikes in Thailand as there are in Vietnam. Downtown Bangkok is full of skyscrapers, street food, cars, incense, statues and people. Pattaya is a beach town (more like a city) about three hours by bus from Bangkok. It's a little more laid-back and a little less congested than Bangkok. We took a bouncy boat ride to an island near Pattaya and went swimming. The salt water was very clear, and we had a nice time. Should have stayed longer, but we got back on the bus.
I like ladies, and boys are OK when they're my students and they behave well. But the blend of ladies and boys isn't my cup of papaya juice. There were many, many lady-boys in Thailand. Either that, or a lot of the pretty girls have Adam's apples and stubble. To each their own, of course, and it's no skin off my butt. Actually, the transexual cultural show we saw had lots of singing, dancing and extravagant costumes, and it was one of our favorite parts of the trip. So there.
The people in Thailand are very nice and polite. Everyone smiles and bows their heads when they greet you. We went with a tour group of Vietnamese folk, and other than cutting in line and reaching across my face at the international buffets, they were quite nice. One lady in particular was helpful, offering mouthwash to Phuong, who threw up every time we rode the bus the first two days. Phuong had a rough start to the trip, but once we discovered motion sickness pills, she was fine. Phuong found a great outdoor restaurant our last night in Bangkok with spectacular (and spicy) food. By the way, Phuong is an awesome travel companion, and she looks hot in a bathing suit.
I'd certainly recommend a visit to Thailand, and I'd definitely recommend the food, if you can handle the spice. I'd also advise you to avoid international buffets, unnecessary bus rides, and beautiful women with stubble and Adam's apples (unless that's your thing -- to each their own). Thailand gets a thumbs-up, but honestly, it's great to be back in Vietnam, where Tet holiday is in full swing and we were greeted by two scorpions in our living room. There really is no place like home.
Note: I spell transexual with one "s" because internet research informed me that transexuals prefer this spelling to "transsexual." What the hell do I know?
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
The rat returns and other issues
Phuong and I were sitting in our kitchen talking two nights ago when a rat slithered under our outside door and into our porch off the kitchen. I didn't see it because I was flapping my jaw as usual, but Phuong spotted it. Phuong got real nervous, saying she can't stand rats. I'm a coward and was ready to stand on a chair. So Phuong opens the back door, grabs a broom, goes onto the porch and starts flogging the rat with the broom. The rat scooted out the open door. Today, Phuong showed me an apple she left out in our kitchen to ripen, and it was half-eaten. You could see the rat's teeth marks where the apple had been chewed. At Phuong's request, her brother is going block the openings in our kitchen and outside doors by screwing strips of metal onto them. Whew, I'm glad I handled that situation so well.
I had to give up my daily walks. People kept hassling me. Some guys would whistle at me (must be my tight shorts), others would yell "Hey you! hey you!" and a lot of teenagers would say the exaggerated and obnoxious "Helllloooo!" to me. Adding insult to insult was the fact that two places I frequented to buy flowers and nuoc mia tried to rip me off, charging me twice the going rate of what they charged me before. And these are people that see me three or four times a week. Now that's smart, customer-centric business. And one woman wouldn't give me my money back when I refused to pay her higher prices. I actually had to snatch my cash from her wrinkly paws. And finally, one teen on a motorbike nearly ran me over, going out of his way to brush past me, shouting "excuuuse meeee, excuuuse meeee." I was going to give him a forearm to the head and knock him off his bike, but there was a teenage girl on the back of his bike. She apparently admired his behavior, because she was laughing and pointing at me the whole time. Maybe I'm crazy, but I think the boy was showing off for the girl. I guess it doesn't matter. Long story short ... the walk is finished ... forever. Oh, and I took my walks between 10:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. Must be a dangerous time to walk here.
Phuong and I are heading to Thailand on Sunday. Can't wait. Even bought some sun block.
Our tennis matches are getting more heated, and it isn't just the weather. Our time expired with the set tied at 5-5 the other day. And there's lots of running now because the points last longer. Fun stuff, even at 7 a.m. After tennis, we grab a coffee by the river. It's quite pleasant. In fact, I never get hassled when I'm with Phuong. Some guys may gawk at her, but everyone has been respectful. When the White Monkey is alone, it's a different story.
Classes are going well, especially the kids' classes. Students are focused more on tet than English, which I totally understand. Just like December in the U.S.
I'm cutting back on my teaching hours, which seemed to please the school, and probably the students as well. I want to spend more time with Phuong.
One last note: This is my 100th blog entry. Maybe I'll celebrate by taking a walk. Nah, bad idea.
I had to give up my daily walks. People kept hassling me. Some guys would whistle at me (must be my tight shorts), others would yell "Hey you! hey you!" and a lot of teenagers would say the exaggerated and obnoxious "Helllloooo!" to me. Adding insult to insult was the fact that two places I frequented to buy flowers and nuoc mia tried to rip me off, charging me twice the going rate of what they charged me before. And these are people that see me three or four times a week. Now that's smart, customer-centric business. And one woman wouldn't give me my money back when I refused to pay her higher prices. I actually had to snatch my cash from her wrinkly paws. And finally, one teen on a motorbike nearly ran me over, going out of his way to brush past me, shouting "excuuuse meeee, excuuuse meeee." I was going to give him a forearm to the head and knock him off his bike, but there was a teenage girl on the back of his bike. She apparently admired his behavior, because she was laughing and pointing at me the whole time. Maybe I'm crazy, but I think the boy was showing off for the girl. I guess it doesn't matter. Long story short ... the walk is finished ... forever. Oh, and I took my walks between 10:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. Must be a dangerous time to walk here.
Phuong and I are heading to Thailand on Sunday. Can't wait. Even bought some sun block.
Our tennis matches are getting more heated, and it isn't just the weather. Our time expired with the set tied at 5-5 the other day. And there's lots of running now because the points last longer. Fun stuff, even at 7 a.m. After tennis, we grab a coffee by the river. It's quite pleasant. In fact, I never get hassled when I'm with Phuong. Some guys may gawk at her, but everyone has been respectful. When the White Monkey is alone, it's a different story.
Classes are going well, especially the kids' classes. Students are focused more on tet than English, which I totally understand. Just like December in the U.S.
I'm cutting back on my teaching hours, which seemed to please the school, and probably the students as well. I want to spend more time with Phuong.
One last note: This is my 100th blog entry. Maybe I'll celebrate by taking a walk. Nah, bad idea.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Rejected, but it's not over yet
Phuong applied for a tourist visa to the USA so she could come there with me in June when I get some work done on my left eye. She had an interview at the embassy in Ho Chi Minh City and was rejected after two questions: Where's your job contract? Where's your bank statements? Of course, she has no job contract because she's self-employed and we didn't know to bring her bank statements. Interview over -- game, set and match. We can apply again, which we will with hopefully more positive results.
Tet holiday is coming Feb. 19 or so, and everyone here is getting wound up. Lots of absences from class, crazy bike riding (as always) and big crowds everywhere. Prices also rise near Tet. And there's still some time before the big holiday. Brilliantly, Phuong and I are going to Thailand for five days leading up to Tet, so we'll miss the real insanity. We're going to Bangkok and Pattaya beach, so we're pretty stoked about the whole thing.
We're still playing tennis three or four times a week, and I'm devastated to report she has beaten me a couple of times. The sun was in my eyes one time, and I drank too much coffee the other time, but I'm not one to make excuses. Actually, I tell Phuong I hate her because she's gotten quite good in a really short time. She understands, but doesn't care and competes really hard. Oh, and I didn't agree with a couple of her calls on shots that I hit. I'm sure they painted the line, and as everyone knows, my eyesight is amazing.
Some nights I teach at two different locations, and the bike ride is quite the thrill. But after almost two years here, I understand the etiquette. People can cut in front of you, pull out on you, and never use their turn signals. They can stop for no reason, run red lights, ride on the sidewalks, and generally put your life in jeopardy at every intersection. But here's the catch, or etiquette. You can do the same stuff, and no one really squawks. I've pulled some really stupid stunts on the bike, and the other drivers didn't flinch. Rules of the road, I guess.
Phuong and I no longer get the creepy looks when we're out together. I think people are used to seeing us together all the time, so the novelty has worn off. The only place that's a drag for me is COOP Mart, where teenagers say really silly "Hellos" to me, people stare at me, everyone cuts in line or bangs into me, and the workers there ignore everything I try to say in Vietnamese. I very rarely go there, obviously, but it's the only place that sells this soap I really like, so when I do go I'll buy every bar in the store.
We've had a stretch of really nice weather here, but the heat is just around the corner. But mornings are very nice, and the 6:30 a.m. bike ride to tennis can actually be, dare I say it, chilly.
Miss my family and friends in the USA, but life here with Phuong is fantastic, so no real complaints.
Tet holiday is coming Feb. 19 or so, and everyone here is getting wound up. Lots of absences from class, crazy bike riding (as always) and big crowds everywhere. Prices also rise near Tet. And there's still some time before the big holiday. Brilliantly, Phuong and I are going to Thailand for five days leading up to Tet, so we'll miss the real insanity. We're going to Bangkok and Pattaya beach, so we're pretty stoked about the whole thing.
We're still playing tennis three or four times a week, and I'm devastated to report she has beaten me a couple of times. The sun was in my eyes one time, and I drank too much coffee the other time, but I'm not one to make excuses. Actually, I tell Phuong I hate her because she's gotten quite good in a really short time. She understands, but doesn't care and competes really hard. Oh, and I didn't agree with a couple of her calls on shots that I hit. I'm sure they painted the line, and as everyone knows, my eyesight is amazing.
Some nights I teach at two different locations, and the bike ride is quite the thrill. But after almost two years here, I understand the etiquette. People can cut in front of you, pull out on you, and never use their turn signals. They can stop for no reason, run red lights, ride on the sidewalks, and generally put your life in jeopardy at every intersection. But here's the catch, or etiquette. You can do the same stuff, and no one really squawks. I've pulled some really stupid stunts on the bike, and the other drivers didn't flinch. Rules of the road, I guess.
Phuong and I no longer get the creepy looks when we're out together. I think people are used to seeing us together all the time, so the novelty has worn off. The only place that's a drag for me is COOP Mart, where teenagers say really silly "Hellos" to me, people stare at me, everyone cuts in line or bangs into me, and the workers there ignore everything I try to say in Vietnamese. I very rarely go there, obviously, but it's the only place that sells this soap I really like, so when I do go I'll buy every bar in the store.
We've had a stretch of really nice weather here, but the heat is just around the corner. But mornings are very nice, and the 6:30 a.m. bike ride to tennis can actually be, dare I say it, chilly.
Miss my family and friends in the USA, but life here with Phuong is fantastic, so no real complaints.
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
OK, I lost my temper
I lost my cool the other day. For the most part, I've accepted the cultural differences here that I don't care for, such as people cutting in line, or ignoring driving lanes and traffic lights, or telling me how fat and old I am. Some (not all) folk are extremely blunt. But I've been extremely Gandhi-like. Until Wednesday morning. Phuong and I were playing tennis when the next group showed up for doubles. They were 20 minutes early, so they sat courtside, and one guy was talking so loud while we were finishing a set that he was a distraction, to say the least. We finished the set anyway and were volleying, but the guy kept flapping his jaw the entire time. His partners talked, but weren't nearly as loud or obnoxious. I looked over a couple of times, but the big-mouth didn't give a crap. So I took action and slammed a tennis ball at him, and it hit the fence next to his head so hard that he flinched. He responded by asking: "What wrong you? What wrong you?" I gave him the icy Vietnamese stare and said in my wretched Vietnamese: "Toi khong tot." I think that means I'm no good, but my Vietnamese is wretched. His friends kind of smirked, so I think they enjoyed my hot-tempered reaction. The big-mouth toned it down because I got his attention. I hate to be an a--hole, but sometimes there's no other option.
Phuong and I have an odd neighbor (and who doesn't?). This guy was singing karaoke into his gigantic sound system at 10:44 p.m. so loud that our walls were shaking.We could barely hear each other talk. You could hear this num-nuts all over the neighborhood. But nobody complained. That's not done here, I'm told, because people don't want trouble. Screw that. For me, this was too much, so we knocked on his door (actually, Phuong had to walk into the house because he and his wife couldn't hear the knocking). We asked politely if he could turn off his music and singing, and he did. Problem solved.
I guess I'm just too big for this country. Our bathroom mirror is so short it reflects my chest and stomach. I have to squat down to see my face in the mirror. Our sink is tiny, and Phuong was upset when I was tossing dishes around due to lack of space.
Food is great here because Phuong is a great cook -- we have octopus, beef, shrimp, awesome chicken, clams, duck, kim chi and everything else. That's why I'm so fat, or so I'm told.
Phuong has applied for a travel visa and we hope to visit the USA in June. We're keeping our fingers crossed.
Classes and students are wonderful. I returned to Long long long long Thanh on Wednesday after some time away, and it was cool to see the kids again. One class was shocked at my massive frame. Good times.
Oh, one funny thing. I saw a woman cut in line to get communion from the priest at last Sunday's mass. Had to laugh at that, although no one really smiles during church services here.
Phuong and I have an odd neighbor (and who doesn't?). This guy was singing karaoke into his gigantic sound system at 10:44 p.m. so loud that our walls were shaking.We could barely hear each other talk. You could hear this num-nuts all over the neighborhood. But nobody complained. That's not done here, I'm told, because people don't want trouble. Screw that. For me, this was too much, so we knocked on his door (actually, Phuong had to walk into the house because he and his wife couldn't hear the knocking). We asked politely if he could turn off his music and singing, and he did. Problem solved.
I guess I'm just too big for this country. Our bathroom mirror is so short it reflects my chest and stomach. I have to squat down to see my face in the mirror. Our sink is tiny, and Phuong was upset when I was tossing dishes around due to lack of space.
Food is great here because Phuong is a great cook -- we have octopus, beef, shrimp, awesome chicken, clams, duck, kim chi and everything else. That's why I'm so fat, or so I'm told.
Phuong has applied for a travel visa and we hope to visit the USA in June. We're keeping our fingers crossed.
Classes and students are wonderful. I returned to Long long long long Thanh on Wednesday after some time away, and it was cool to see the kids again. One class was shocked at my massive frame. Good times.
Oh, one funny thing. I saw a woman cut in line to get communion from the priest at last Sunday's mass. Had to laugh at that, although no one really smiles during church services here.
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